I have often wondered, why a year as a child felt like an eternity and then why time seems to go by faster as we age?
I used to think that the reason time felt so much faster as an adult was because we were busier and doing more each day. Although when I stop and think about it, a child is NOT less busy than an adult, it is just a different kind of busyness. I also wondered if time moving faster was related to the amount of memories we had. If having more and more stored memories made time feel like it was moving quicker.
For the first time, I read a reason for this perception of time phenomena (from a book I recommend, Off The Clock: Feel Less Busy While Getting More Done by Laura Vanderkam) and I thought this information was worth sharing with you.
As I talk about in my habits class, studies have estimated that around 40% of our waking time is spent in “automatic” mode, where our brain is conserving energy and doing what it has always done without thinking about it. While our brain is in this conservation state it does not catalog information into our brain as memories. This conservation of energy is necessary to live. There are too many stimuli and way too many decisions to possibly make every day. Our brains would go into overwhelm if we thought about every possible decision consciously, as if they were new. There is a reason for this automatic mode. It helps us but it can also decrease the happiness and quality of our life if we don’t remember things.
Part of the reason each day and year feels like so much longer as a child is that so many of a child’s experiences are for the first time.
They are experiencing a newness and wonder and excitement and figuring things out that gradually decreases as we get older. It was described in the book that something you repeated do, is collapsed down to one thing or one “time unit” in the brain. That daily half hour commute over the year is in reality 500 hours yet our brain only remembers it as one time unit. Your brain “loses” the time of this repetitive and non-memorable twice daily event. The number of these time units in the brain determines our estimates and perception of time later.
The more you remember the more time expands.
“We all say we want more time but what we really want are more good memories.”
Times of high emotion and unique situations are memorable.
There is the famous saying, the days are long but the years are short. I think each day can feel long, because we are generally doing the same thing or a version of the same thing almost every day. It doesn’t feel fun or new or exciting. If we are not creating new memories, when we think back on the year, the brain perceives it as not much time because not many time units were stored. The brain’s awareness of time collapses to time units instead of the actual time spent.
Travel and special events make memories because they are so different from our usual experience.
When you are doing something fun or something you love, time flies by yet chances are you will remember it and your perception of that time may seem longer in your brain than it truly was.
There are things we can do to help us remember things and savor happy moments better.
This information is from the book, Savoring: A New Model of Positive Experience by Fred B. Bryant and Joseph Veroff. Here is what I remembered and compiled from their “Ways of Savoring Checklist” (I originally wrote what I remembered from this list and then I looked it up to provide their actual list. I decided I liked a combination of the two instead of giving you their published list.)
- Notice specific things with your other senses – the smell, feel, sounds (like a song), touch or taste
- Take a picture in your mind and / or a real picture
- Tell someone you are with how much this moment means to you and why
- Think about how you will share the memory later with other people
- Remind yourself how long you had waited for or wanted and anticipated this event
- Share the experience in the moment and afterwards – tell the stories verbally and also write about it in a book or journal to help you remember.
- Make an effort to be more alert, take deep breaths and slow down. Be fully present.
- Remind yourself that nothing lasts forever and make an effort to enjoy the moment now.
Not every day or every moment is meant to be memorable.
But I do think it is worth noticing when it feels like you are not having enough memorable days or moments.
We all can make an effort to prioritize making memories – being present with others, having rich conversations with friends, doing activities you love…
There are so many simple miracles and memories if we make the effort to notice them and treasure them in the moment and after the fact. When life is speeding by with trying to fit too much in, we may not stop and carve out the time for making ourselves happy and creating memories to cherish and retell or think about years later.
I have touchstone memories that I go to and relive most mornings as part of my gratefulness practice. Some are from long ago (my husband and my first kiss, a moment from my wedding day, hiking in Bend, OR with my family, running over the Golden Gate Bridge) and then I make an effort to think of a memory and something I am grateful for from the day before.
I hope this article gave you something to think about. I loved learning about why our perception of time changes as we age and felt the need to share it with you. I think this information can make a difference in our lives and our happiness. It also reinforced many of the concepts from the Happy Money Book I shared previously.
Carve out some purposeful time and make the effort to slow down and make some memories. And then savor them. It is worth it.
Wishing you the best.
With love,
Tara
Recent Comments