Dr. Bob Eng is a small, thin wise-looking Asian American who goes running every day. He waves at the people he sees running and thinks “Hey, you are not invisible to me.” That is an important part of Bob’s legacy. He wants to make sure that everyone feels seen. He considers that he may be the first (and possibly only) person to acknowledge that person’s presence that day. He makes an effort so that everyone feels like they are a valid participant in the world. Bob consciously creates these “people-to-people” moments as part of his desired legacy.
Bob is an example of someone who thinks both big and small. He is taking action at the macro, cultural and structural level to bring about climate change but he also does the little things every day to help those around him feel seen and validated as a member of society.
I am getting started on my “Legacy” book. Slowly. Slowly. But I am taking action. Those of you who read these emails will get a glimpse into the messy drafts, my initial writings and process. You can be along for the ride. Feel free to unsubscribe at any time.
I am starting my interviews with people I feel comfortable with to ease my way into this interviewing and writing a book thing. I have a set of interview questions to start from and then my hope is that my curiosity and each person’s perspective will lead to a unique and interesting discussion. I want to write something from each interview.
My first willing participant was my good friend and colleague, Dr. Bob Eng, CFA. I have known Bob since 2013. Our friendship and ways of working together have continued to grow over the years. I respect Bob immensely. He lives intentionally and is one of the most centered, thoughtful and value driven people I know.
Bob is a financial advisor. He is into health and wellness and is working towards becoming a wellness coach. He is an enthusiastic and doting father and grandfather. He makes spending time with his family a priority and helps take care of his two young grandsons. Bob has a PhD in moral ethics and plays the bass. (Talk about a diverse multidisciplinary background!) He has worked as a teacher and is an activist. He strives to align the various aspects of his life and in that vein, recently started the non-profit, Advisors for Good. He has been on multiple non-profit boards and even gotten involved politically. I feel like there is nothing he cannot or is not willing to do. To me, Bob’s greatest strengths are his ability to listen, his curiosity, his ability to connect with people and how he lives his values. All of these are things I greatly admire.
Bob thinks of Legacy as a representation or symbolization of our own positive aspirations. Legacy has the connotation that values are carried forward and known to future generations.
A key idea that Bob mentioned was that Legacy is created no matter what. Some of us are more intentional and think about what we want our legacy to be and others do not, yet we are still remembered for certain things after we are gone. We cannot control how or what people think or remember about us but hopefully what we do and the actions we take will have an influence on this.
Bob’s said his parents didn’t articulate a legacy for themselves. They were immigrants to the US from China and were both hard working laborers. Although they did not “declare” a legacy, he believes that how they lived their lives created a legacy through their emphasis and value on education. They believed an education could help their children rise above what they had experienced and the lives that they had lived. Bob’s parents didn’t have the children do household chores so they could focus on their studies instead. His parents wanted their children to live a fulfilling and happy life and be contributing citizens of the world. This was the legacy they created or Bob interpreted from how they raised him and his siblings.
Bob’s parents did an amazing job. Bob and all of his siblings have higher degrees from very prestigious schools. A pedigree any parent would love to brag about. Yet Bob is one of the most humble, kind, and purposeful people I know.
Bob believes in the saying paraphrased from Luke in the New Testament, “For of those to whom much is given much is required.” He considers himself very blessed that he had parents who encouraged and valued education so much and feels a responsibility to share his skills, talents, and knowledge with as many people as possible. He continues to experiment with ways that best take advantage of his talents and skills. Bob often talks about his desire to leave the world better than he found it.
Bob is trying to figure out where and how he can have the most impact yet he does not discount the little things. There is a broad range of ways to make a difference – family, friends, and children, basically making a difference with the close relationships in our life. And then there is also the broad / bigger changes – structural and cultural shifts by joining or starting groups for positive movements. Bob wants to transmit blessings for a better world on both a small and big scale and lives his life accordingly.
Bob is passionate about climate change.
I love that he is willing to take on BIG causes with small and mindful actions. Bob focuses on himself and his relationships. Bob is a great example of doing something now, with whatever you have and wherever you are. Starting Advisors for Good is a perfect example of that. Advisors for Good is moving forward with his consistent actions and leadership and collaborating with others.
Bob is so humble that when I asked him what he is most proud of, I got the feeling he didn’t want to answer the question. He then laughed and he said, “I am terrible at these kinds of questions.” When I pressed him, he said that what comes to mind was that he has a “knack” for and enjoys listening to, and engaging with people of all ages and all stations of life. Bob is a very curious person and loves to ask people questions. He notices the implied social hierarchies that are all around us – at our jobs, in society, where we live. Bob makes an effort to put these hierarchies aside. He wants to learn from and engage with people at all levels. He respects people and wants everyone to feel that respect.
Bob told me that when he was working as a community worker, a 17 year old told him that he was the only older person that listened to them. This was what Bob said he was proud most of. He believes that social interactions are powerful and make a difference. Connecting person to person is valuable. Bob wants all people to feel seen even when he is running down the street and he wants to leave the world a better place through his deliberate actions.
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