For me, it all started with seeing Carl Richards speak at a conference. I am a huge Carl Richards fan and he did not disappoint. I love his messages and valuable insights. (On a side note, Carl Richards has a new podcast that I highly recommend, “50 Fires: Money and Meaning.) At this presentation, Carl Richards talked about working with his financial advisor and how helpful it was for him and his wife. I admit, I was surprised that HE had a financial advisor and I think this gave me permission to want one too. I liked his presentation so much I made my husband watch the recording. I wanted us to get our own financial advisor. I have been our financial planner since we got married. I am a CFP® and this is what I have done as my job since 2005.
I admit that part of my motivation for finding someone to be our financial advisor was because I don’t LOVE doing our planning, especially investments. I can do investments; I just don’t enjoy it. I also didn’t feel like my husband “heard” what I was saying whenever we talked about our finances. I wanted my husband to be more involved and have more of a voice in our financial decisions. This was not happening with me doing it. The dynamic between us and our finances was not what I wanted. After some coercing, I convinced my husband that we should find someone besides me to do our financial planning.
First, we asked a good friend of mine, a fellow financial planner to help us. Yes, we would pay him. This friend said no. He did not think it would be fair to my husband because he and I are such good friends. My husband and I were both disappointed with this answer but in hindsight I respect that my friend was honest, and I believe correct.
We did what I recommend all people do – talk to and interview at least 3 financial advisors. I asked a few people I like and respect for some recommendations. I got the names of three financial advisors.
I wanted a good financial planner. One who would dig deeper into our values and ask, “What is the money for? What kind of life do you really want to live? What is most important to you?” I realize not all planners do this, yet I believe a good planner does. I wanted that for us. I believe that choosing who you work with is an important and (hopefully) a long-term relationship. I wanted to work with someone who both my husband and I like and respect and that we “clicked” with. This is why I wanted us to talk to three planners, so we would have some comparisons and options.
We ended up talking to more than three advisors. It took us almost a year (!) to find our financial advisor. (This is NOT normal and probably because I am a tough critic of my own profession.) One planner was too intense, one felt too young, some were too expensive. I am mentioning this because I truly believe you should keep looking until you find someone that feels “right” for you and your spouse. You want to find someone that you both are comfortable with and who you WANT to and are excited to work with.
My objectives for finding an financial advisor / planner were:
- To help my husband and I have the deeper financial conversations we were not having.
- To be more intentional and hopefully be more comfortable with our spending, our commitments, plans, and our savings.
- To start thinking about and planning for our next phase where my husband is not working so much. (My husband hopes to “retire” (or not have to work as he currently is) in 5-10 years. Is that possible?)
- To have an expert person looking at and helping us with our investments, insurance, taxes, estate planning, benefits, and planning our next phase. I don’t know my own blind spots.
- We both want to be more charitable. What would that look like and how can we best do that?
I feel like I have done a good job with our finances, yet I thought that hiring someone else would bring a discipline and focus that was not happening with me doing our planning.
I am writing about this here because I truly believe almost everyone would benefit from having a financial planner / financial advisor. This is what I do for a living so yes, I am biased. I am capable of doing it and yet we are choosing to spend our money on hiring a financial advisor because we believe that the value gained in working with one is worth more than the costs.
I would love to know what holds people back from getting a financial advisor. If it is the cost, then what if there was proof that over the long term, an advisor significantly improves the chances of achieving your financial goals. Would that be enough? Does it have to save you / benefit you more than you are spending for the advice? I believe that is true also. We chose to hire someone to help my husband and I get clearer on what we want and how to better accomplish it. I also wanted the peace of mind and comfort to know that I had an objective expert on our side (and in my particular situation, a second opinion) looking out for both my husband and my financial success.
Would we have been ok without a financial advisor? Yes, most definitely. Yet, I still believe we will be better off financially, emotionally, and living a more intentional life because of the money we are spending on our financial advisor.
Next time, I will write about what it is like to be sitting on the other side of the table as a client instead of as the financial planner. 😊
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